sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
