I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
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I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
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WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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