just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
