You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
