i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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