i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
They have beer where we have blood.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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