Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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