I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
