Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."