You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
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Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
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No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Good thing I've started drinking again