Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury http://tfl.nu/f86j
  Replies (13) Good night (986) Bad night (733)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!" http://tfl.nu/ezhs
  Replies (13) Good night (2549) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist... http://tfl.nu/i7x2
  Replies (15) Good night (4862) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s http://tfl.nu/wt0n
  Replies (28) Good night (5107) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry http://tfl.nu/jhtm
  Replies (12) Good night (1299) Bad night (5721)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan. http://tfl.nu/6sdz
  Replies (8) Good night (3508) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated http://tfl.nu/hyb4
  Replies (17) Good night (5367) Bad night (1716)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs. http://tfl.nu/utqj
  Replies (35) Good night (8561) Bad night (1575)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day. http://tfl.nu/pq24
  Replies (12) Good night (7414) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (361): I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off. http://tfl.nu/sc97
  Replies (21) Good night (4367) Bad night (1559)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes. http://tfl.nu/5pct
  Replies (6) Good night (2726) Bad night (677)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body. http://tfl.nu/1j67
  Replies (6) Good night (1847) Bad night (541)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family http://tfl.nu/lw7x
  Replies (1) Good night (1079) Bad night (350)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (306): We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned. http://tfl.nu/jttg
  Replies (1) Good night (594) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face! http://tfl.nu/7j4j
  Replies (2) Good night (308) Bad night (499)

Randomize