he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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