My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Randomize
