I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize