And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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