fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize