i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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