I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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