Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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