Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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