theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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