We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
