he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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