so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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