3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
zippers are such a cool invention
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
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