i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
