You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
