but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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