There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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