the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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