yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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