Porn is love you can see.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
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Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
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the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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