Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
