i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
