Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
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