so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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