I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
How naked do you want me to be?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
