like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
apparently the secret to your success is patron
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
