also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize
