this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
