he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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