I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
