Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize