Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Randomize
