He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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