sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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