No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
