you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Randomize
