I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
