You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
