gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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