Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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